Swelltide.

I've been feeling bummed. Down. Having problems sleeping. No appetite. The blues.

The people around me, who know of my being bipolar; most of them haven't realized yet that this means I deal with depression. Or they haven't given it much thought. Being mildly depressed is standard for me. Having problems motivating myself. Finding enjoyment in things. I've lived with depression for so long though, I know of ways around it. I've learned ways of ignoring it, pushing through it, and pretending for everyone else that everything is okay. Sometimes, it is hard. Sometimes, I can't.

I got a 40% on my first chemistry quiz, and beat myself up about for a little while. I know what I need to do. I need to hit the books. I need to practice the math. I need to catch up. I didn't have this in high school. I should have been been doing this from the first day of class. I'll know that I am in real trouble after this week coming up. A biology test, and a chemistry test. 

My girlfriend came home for a day, then went back to her mom's. She's feeling clausterphobic at home. Having some weird symptoms, and having a hard time eating. Being around her mom helps her to feel better, and eases some anxiety.