Swelltide.

In a terrible mood. Irritable. Don't think I slept well last night. Meant to talk to the psychiatrist about getting sleep or getting something to help me sleep, but the appointment was cancelled. Low-grade headache all day. Come home, and find vomit and poo all over the floors. The cat has been throwing up.

Therapy today, which went well. Had a chance to voice my apprehension about school. Not having money saved up. The likelihood that I won't be able to hold this job and go to school at the same time. Not knowing what to expect. Hearing about this big job at work that is going to start up right around the time that school starts-- they are expecting it to be my job, and I haven't told anyone about college. I've said nothing about having to go full-time. I have no idea what to do in this situation. I tell them, and they could just get rid of me. I don't tell them, and there goes my chances of holding on to the job. I could lose my job out of spite, and I could lose it because holding on to it isn't a realistic option.

A doctor's follow up after therapy. I needed a family physician to get my immunizations for school. Had a physical. My first in more than years. Doctor handling my man-bits, which was fun. Blood work tomorrow. I'm getting older and the doctor felt like it was time to check all the getting older things. Blood sugar. Cholesterol. My testicles.

I feel like all I do anymore is support the health care system. Doctor. Doctor. Therapy. Prescription. Pills. Doctor. I usually don't mind, but today has just been that kind of day.

Tomorrow is supposed to be busy. There is a chance that I could end up working this weekend, which I don't really want to think about.

I will be glad-- whatever happens, when it happens-- so that I can stop thinking about all of this. Start dealing with some of the things. Get school out of the way. Find a good job. Get married. Have kids. Save money...