Swelltide.

My prescription has lapsed, again. It has been a couple of days and I haven't had the ambition, the drive to get it filled. I am not even sure where the prescription actually is and my next psychiatry meeting isn't until next week. Therapy this week, I need to cancel because of circumstances at work.

I alternate between feeling invincible and being full of energy, to feeling like I can't do anything. The last couple of days, I've barely been able to get myself out of bed on time and show up to work when I am supposed to. It just doesn't seem important. Due in no small part, because of nights like tonight where it gets late and I'm not tired, or don't want to go to bed.

Work has been a bust for me the last few days. I drive the hour to work and find out that nothing is really going on. I am glad for the break, seeing as how last week I worked a jillion hours. I deserve it, somehow. Though I know that I should be working all that I can now as school is coming up and I could use the money.

What ever. Woe is me. I keep coming back to that, no matter how much I try. Try to focus on the positive. Try not to forget where I set something down. Try not to forget to put my reports through the system at the end of the day. Try to wake up on time. I always forget something, or forget to do something. It gets old. Having to make excuses, because I can't get out of bed on time or remember where something is.

On a lighter note, I was reading the Hobbit aloud to my girlfriend in bed. She fell asleep. It has been a while since we've done anything like this. Having our own place has been good for us both. I am afraid that when school starts, I am going to be so busy with work and my studies that I won't have time for things like this anymore. Spending time with her grounds me. It keeps me stable and focused. If it wasn't for her, I would probably be living out of my car and selling bootlegged movies to feed myself or something. She makes me sane.