Swelltide.

Overslept this morning but was in no hurry because of the weather last night. Running late, obviously, and come to a red light in town where I see the a co-worker drive past. The office gossip girl. Fun.
My boss later-- the only person at work that to whom I have confessed to being bipolar, claims he came by my job this morning. "I didn't see you." This really means, the troublemaker 'saw you running late.' Why he gets involved in this pathetic, high school stuff is beyond me. I didn't lie or make any excuses. I didn't say much of anything. Whatever.

I would love to have a job where every person of equal station is expected to perform equally. This doesn't happen. I'm sure it works this way in nearly every other place of private business. There are friends and relatives here working together. People do the best they can to do the least they can. People who work hard, and aren't prone to complaining get stuck with all the difficult tasks. I am one of these people. One of a few.

I won't have to settle for this for much longer. School.  At this juncture, I will be working at this place part time, but if it continues to be this way-- favorites, friends, relatives, I will borrow the money for bills and find a different job. I don't want to be dealing with this kind of thing when I have other, bigger things to worry about.

Now of course, I am working early tomorrow and I'm really trying not to read to much into it. I'm being punished, but really shouldn't care. Even if I'm being pushed out, because I'm going back to school and want better for myself, I shouldn't care. But, I do.

Anyway, I haven't been sleeping well lately. Tired. Unmotivated. Can't seem to want to get out of bed. So many things I should be doing or working on-- and I just don't feel like it. In a downward mood cycle. Hope my outlook and my energy return for school.