Swelltide.

So, things might be changing a little. I've invited someone from the bipolarsupport.org forums to join me here. My goal, beyond just writing as a way to process and learn, has always been to form a community of sorts. People reading what I've written, with others who also live with bipolar joining in. This is a small step toward that goal, and I hope it happens. This is exciting to me. I'll be adding a bunch of links that I've discovered and find useful to the links page, also.

Today was a short work day for me and there isn't anything major to report-- other than the medication might, finally, be taking affect. I am feeling far more stable today than I have in a while. My thoughts aren't cloudy. I'm not manic. I'm not down, tired and wanting to shut myself off from the world but, I can't be sure that I've reached a level part of my natural mood cycle. It's the one thing that I really don't like about this whole bipolar thing.

I'm angry. Is it because I'm hypomanic? I'm irritable-- manic? I'm feeling quiet and am seeking out quiet. Am I on a depressive downswing? It is so hard to tell what shift in my mood is due to the bipolar and what is just a normal thing. Especially with anger, frustration, feeling contemplative. I still don't understand.

Therapy. My girlfriend and I have decided that before we embark on couples counseling-- I need a few one-on-one sessions, which I haven't relayed to my therapist yet. Is that wrong? I'm sure that she has put some work and thought into the next session but she is only at this particular office for two days out of the week. I wouldn't know what number to call to let her know. I wouldn't know where else she spends her time. We will see how that goes.

Anyway. Sparta, if you're reading this. I hope you join me. I could use a friend or two and I hope you feel the same. Welcome to our site.