Thursday, February 6, 2014

Swelltide.

Have been feeling detached, isolated... and the things that go along with feeling that way. I can't seem to focus on anything for longer than a few minutes. I lose interest in stories, shows and conversation. I find myself having conversations with the therapist that I haven't been to see in months now. We go back and forth in my head about the same old things, which tells me a few things. I haven't really reached a state of resolution with many of the emotions that I've been dragging behind me for most of my adult life. I may be in need of someone to just listen, without judgement. And, I probably do need to go talk with someone.

I hate this bipolar thing, and by extension-- I hate parts of myself. There are many days where I would give anything to be a normal guy, working a normal and boring job, able and content to live by whatever circumstances that life has allotted me. Going out for a few beers with my boring friends. Playing in a fantasy football league or something. Finding happiness in the 'little things,' I guess.




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